A Change of Heart

I've been trying to start this post for a week, but somehow just couldn't. It has been such an indescribable week, in so many ways. I guess I'll start with last weekend. We had a respite care placement over the weekend; I'll call her Miss B. It started out a little rocky, but by the end of the weekend, we were all just in love with her. Really. This was totally unexpected. We hadn't even wanted any kids over 8, and she was 15. All of the sudden, John and I were forced to totally reevaluate what we were doing, and why we had set that limitation. So, to make a long story short, we both realized that having Miss B with us over the weekend had finally forced us to see that God did not want us to have a limitation. Looking back, I see the point where this was first clear as day. I had gone to a foster care training meeting called Panel Night. The current foster parents and their placements would come to answer questions and encourage the newbies (note: this was over a year ago). One of the workers asked the teenagers to tell us all why we should consider taking teenagers. While I sat and listened to these answers, I got that -- call. That Holy Spirit smack that you get and you're supposed to listen to. But, I was so concerned about what *we* wanted, that I just dismissed it. I mentioned it to JP too, but he also felt it would be better if we didn't.

And so, you guys know what a hard time we've had just starting. I think if we'd just paid attention to start with, it wouldn't have been so hard. This year with our church's youth has definitely prepared us for what's to come. You'd think that kids in church would have less problems than your average ordinary, but, at least for our church, that's plainly just not the case. We have a great support system for teenagers, and, let's face it, my husband is just outstanding with teenagers. Truly. I still haven't given up on my hopes for some little ones for my babies to play with, but I suddenly see the value of having teenagers too.

I miss Miss B still.

And so, as you might guess, the next placement was quick to come. We actually got the call on Monday. This one I can't really talk about very much, just because it's a sensitive case. Little Mama was 16. She came on Wednesday, and we had her for about 2 hours. She was supposed to be a temporary placement, although not as temporary as it turned out to be. All I can say is that the agency was not at fault here, and we were not at fault here, and nothing really "happened". It's a reminder that it's not all sunshine and roses, and we have to be very careful about the placements that we take.

Wednesday afternoon we got a call for yet another placement. We are supposed to find out on Monday or Tuesday whether she'll actually be coming. This girl is 18, and would be a permanent placement. That's really all I can tell you at this point because it's all that I know. Pray for us! Pray that if we can help this girl, that she'll give us a shot.

We've had a crazy weekend. I'll have to post about the Beth Moore retreat and the Volunteer Appreciation soon... don't let me forget.